Patience is running out.. God, help me.
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Ever since a friend of mine related to me an absurd story, I always wanted to blog about it. It was only yesterday though, haha. My friend is an undeniably hot chick, with great qualities and has a mile of suitors queuing in the line. Among these suitors, there are the skinny but good-looking ones who take things slow – who want to be more than best friends and promise to wait even when they know she’s furthering her studies overseas – and also those who are just too good for her; as good as garbage.
It happened that this friend met a guy by the name of Garbage at her cousin’s birthday party, and he invited her to go cycling. He was someone she barely knew for a day. When she smsed him to reject the invitation, he called her up and spent a good two hours rattling on and on about how she attractive she was at the party and how she caught his eyes (wait. why doesn’t this happen to me?). Towards the end of the conversation, she had a nasty shock when he, all of a sudden, told her something like “Now I’m going to offer you an indecent proposal, but you can’t tell anyone.“:
Indecent proposal #1 – Stay
1. Overnight at my house (please forget your clothes, you can wear mine. or none)
2. Watch some movies that you like or I think you would like (would porn be good?)
3. Switch on the aircon (atmosphere, lady)
4. Bring some food like strawberries that we can feed each other with (wouldn’t we all be hungry after.. that?)
5. Only 24 tickets left (hurry or else you’ll be the 25th that night)
::: Underlying message: Let’s do it at my house, I’m lazy to travel, much less ask you on a proper date.
Indecent proposal #2 – Trip
1. Travel to Malaysia (I can’t think of a better place)
2. Take a bit of trouble to plan the trip (why, cause I wouldn’t want to land up in the bushes)
3. Book a hotel (voila! the magic word! Prendo un letto matrimoniale *ask Esther about it*)
4. Just the two (2) of us, unless more join in along the way (babies? anyone?)
5. Avoid having trouble bringing things out of Malaysia at the customs (did I mention, babies?)
::: Underlying message: Yeah yeah, gonna spend some time and money on you, but I’ll get the sex. By the way, you could help me load the baggages as well thank you.
Being smart as she is, she told him a downright NO and that he can leave his creative proposals to all the other girls.
I always thought girls are the ones who bother to go a full circle before getting to the main point? What Garbage had been trying so hard to say was just, “Hey chick, you’re hot. Let me **** you?” So for the first time, it occurred to me that sub-species of Things You Find In The Bin like this exist, only that I haven’t been in contact with one before. They obviously have been very much deprived, poor things. Where did their dignity go?
The next time he dares to call, I’ll grab the phone from my friend and make sure I bang the phone so hard it sends him straight to the school for the deaf. But again, I think she can do it very well too.
Hi there, I hope you get your share of rotten strawberries and fresh garbage hurled in your face.
What an EFFIN’ piece of wonderful crap.
It’s way over time.
I laughed a lot, because you made me. I hoped, because you gave me.
I sought, I used to, yet I have never come to an understanding.
At other times, I got frustrated, because you always slipped away.
You are like thin air, yes because you’re never really there.
I see through you, because I can’t see you.
Far from what I thought you were, you are intangible.
I am convinced, and there won’t be any more conflicting emotions.
While they find excuses to keep them,
I found many to lose my infatuation with you.
I’ll run, I’ll turn away. It comes naturally,
so don’t ask.
The last.
The times; it’s long gone.
You haunt me, the red and the white.
I no longer find your presence (or disappearance) of any significance.
Even if you’re right here beside me.
My phantom lover,
no more.
1.5, labour day? Can I tell you I was working on the pixel animation, graphics and html pages for the designing for mobile module? 1.5, yet I’m revisiting Project 3 for the nth time. For Crowbars 2008, Interactive. Not too hopeful at all. Go here. Billy Lee? The first child prodigy in advertising :S that’s scary.
Overseas internship placements available in countries such as Hong Kong, Taiwan, Australia and so on. CDI project, I didn’t reject because when I think of spending a couple of months abroad (minus minus minus the $) and actually working as a student designer, the idea sounds wow, too undescribable. That’s right, I’ll try for it. Gonna be extremely busy in a few months’, maybe weeks’, time, and even if I can’t get to go overseas, I still get to build up my portfolio with the CDI project.
*pauses*
What?
Ok. Right. I’m bluffing. I really hate doing corporate designs. Anyhow, Crowbars first.
Back to work.
